However, there are definitely some verses that I keep logged in my memory bank—or hidden in my heart, if you will. These verses help me in times of distress and emotional unrest. These verses keep me focused on God’s promises rather than my problems. I would encourage you to also memorize these. Keep them close to you. Put them on your phone background screen. Write them on sticky notes and hang them on your mirror so you can see them first thing in the morning. I pray they encourage your heart and lift your head today!

A read a lot of books on my healing journey. Some of them great, and some of them not-so-great. Here are my top choices. Hope this helps you on your own healing journey.

I wonder if you’ve ever felt the same way. Whether you have or haven’t lost someone close to you, you've probably known someone who has. You’ve probably been faced with a moment like this. Perhaps not having to speak publicly to a group of grieving folks, but maybe you’ve walked across a room to console someone face-to-face and with each step searched for the words to say that could bring some kind of comfort, answers, and reasoning for their pain.

I believe the principle of the Sabbath — perhaps more than any other principle that governs our household — has accelerated that process for us. Not to mention it has revolutionized our mental, emotional, and even physical health. If you’re not familiar with the concept of the Sabbath and/or you don’t practice a weekly Sabbath, I would highly recommend you familiarizing yourself with the concept of Sabbath Rest and implementing it into your life and weekly rhythms. Below are a couple links to resources that may help you get started:

Suffering has a way of intruding. It isn’t respectful. It doesn’t ask for permission. Though it also isn’t biased. It causes the just and the unjust, the good and the evil, to take a step back and reorient their lives. It shoves it’s way into our daily rhythms and forces us to ask questions of ourselves we never wished to entertain before. However it’s subtle and sly in the way it does so. It doesn’t hold a proverbial gun to our head and force us to drink from a cup we weren’t already holding. It reveals and exposes what was already in our hearts -- the cup that was already in our hands. In the face of suffering some drink out of the cup of coping mechanisms, while others drink from the cup that conquers.

November.

It has been a month in which I’ve experienced the highest of highs and the lowest of lows that life could throw at you. It is a month full of life-altering milestones both tragically and triumphantly. Year over year, more than just the turning of the leaves and the transition from Summer into Winter, November always seems to bring significant change to my life.

My dad asked me the other day how this time of year makes me feel. The truth is, when I hear even the word November, thousands of tiny synapses fire through my nerves. It would be impossible to properly describe to you how this time of year truly makes me feel.

But I’ll try . . .

The world our daughters face everyday is perilous. The only hope for our kids is showing them the love of Jesus early and that their value and worth stems from what He feels about them. I’m learning that providing a safe, secure, validating, and warm environment in our home and in my relationship with Natalia is the key to helping her make better decisions later.

You may have noticed we have a new logo and look! We’ve been working with a local Indianapolis design company called Makers to roll out a new look for Nothing is Wasted Ministries. There is more to come including a massive website overhaul, but for now we wanted to give you a sneak peak at our new logo!

This is an anvil. Why did we choose an anvil as our logo? Let me tell you more . . .

. . . You see, growth not only brings about change, but change — and often painful change at that — can also be its own right a catalyst for growth. If I keep doing what I’ve always done, I’ll keep getting what I’ve always gotten. And if what I’ve always gotten is status quo, some type of uncomfortable or painful change will be required in order to kick-start new growth in my life. Sometimes I am brave enough to initiate it. But many times, God in His goodness, sees it necessary to shake me out of the rut I’ve found myself in and, Himself, be the initiator of some kind of change in my life. Drastic, unwelcome, and even excruciating change has now entered my life four times. Each time initiated by factors out of my control . . .

Over the next several weeks and months as we sit and reflect on the impact Resonate Church has made in Indianapolis and in the world, countless faces, names, and stories will fill our thoughts - stories of healing, life-change, freedom, and salvation. We will be forever grateful for the volunteers and staff who labored tirelessly to see the Gospel spread in Indianapolis and in the world around it.

My greatest fear in life would be doing something or leading my family in a direction that is against what God has called us to do. Ever since I gave my life to Jesus when I was eight, and especially since I was called into full-time ministry at eighteen, I have learned that the most fulfilling and fruitful place to be is at the center of God’s will. But sometimes leaving where you are to move into that center can be terrifying.

We know many of you were unable to enjoy this day with us, so we wanted to share it with you! I know it’s been a year but we had some difficulties getting our video footage produced, but thanks to the incredible film-making and story-telling abilities of our friend, @_melbox, we were able to get something put together. I’m sure it’s at just the right time to encourage someone who watches it. Enjoy!

I know the two of them would have had much to talk about. Both loved basketball, Chip and Joanna Gaines, and photography. Both ran competitively in their teenage years, Amanda with the cross-country team in high school and Kristi the 4x400 relay in high school as well as cross-country in college. Both felt freest when they laced up their Asics and strode out on a country road for a couple miles. Kristi in particular was an incredible long-distance sprinter, posting a 59.2 second 400 split with a baton in her hand.

You never know when you’re about to face trial. If only trial would call you up and warn you when it was coming into your life. 

“Hey man! It’s your old friend, trial! Yeah! It has been a while. How’s your mom and them? Good, good! Hey listen, I was thinking about moving in for a bit starting on the . . . . hmmm . . . let’s see . . . the 13th of this month? How’s that sound? Your calendar clear? Ok great. We’ll see you soon!” 

If only it would happen like that. Then maybe we could prepare for adversity. Then maybe we could, as my friend Pastor Levi Lusko writes in his book Through the Eyes of a Lion, “train for the trial we’re not yet in.”

You never know when you’re about to face trial.

Kristi and I just flipped a house! I know, I know, before the Chip and Joanna Gaines comments begin to flood this post (especially since my wife looks strikingly similar to Joanna) I want to tell you why we did it. It certainly isn’t because we were bored or had an abundance of free time on our hands. That’s the furthest thing from reality. It isn't because we're looking at house-flipping as a new career path. I’m still pastoring and hopefully always will and she’s still in PA school. And no, we didn’t flip the house we live in. We flipped a rental property. And we have a strong reason for doing so even amidst the chaos of our lives. 

As I stood on the banks of the Jordan River for the first time since April 2016, God brought me back to all the feelings, all the tears, all the stomach clenching pain that accompanied my first trip to Israel. And as I walked away from the muddy waters of the Jordan I saw things clearer than I ever have. God had just brought me full circle. Back to the Place of the Crossing. Back to the healing waters of the Jordan. In a very short amount of time He’d allowed me to experience the loss of the most precious person in my life, suffer through the aftermath of that, find hope and healing in Him, and then bring someone precious into my life again . . . God’s redemptive story for my life coming full circle once again. 

The enemy would love for you to believe you’re alone in your journey — that you’re the only one dealing with the pain you’re currently undergoing.

The truth is there are hundreds, maybe thousands of people who are walking through very similar trials as you. When your eyes are opened up to this, it makes your problems seem much smaller in the light of the larger picture of pain in this world.

Every year for the past several years I’ve identified a word for the year. I used to only choose a word for our church. Now I choose a word for our church and a word for our family. In the past the word has often been based on a concept or an idea that I couldn’t get off my mind. It usually spawned from lessons The Lord was teaching me the final couple months of the previous year. I’ve always want this word to provide us with a unified sense of purpose and direction for the coming year - in one case for our volunteers and staff, and in the other for my family.

You see, several months after Amanda passed I wrote something in my prayer journal:  Lord, if you ever bring me another wife here’s what I ask for, that she loves you more than she loves me, that she loves me, that she loves Weston, and that she loves Amanda. 

Last Friday, October 27th, our family stepped into a significant season of this journey. As many of you may have heard, Jalen Watson (one of the men on trial for Amanda’s murder) officially submitted a plea agreement. I purposefully took a little time before I commented on this because unless you’re walking through it it’s impossible to understand what something like this does to you emotionally.