Sometimes, we can try to cover up our past pain with that which we can control—achievement, performance, productivity. But at some point, those coping mechanisms cannot mask the hurt we are feeling deep inside anymore. What do you do when what you've done to run from your past no longer works to hide what you're truly feeling?

For Dr. Elizabeth (Ellie) Stevens, there came a point when what she did to keep the pain from her childhood sexual abuse at bay, no longer worked. She found that she could no longer hide behind performance and her achievements and instead had to face what was below the surface. It took another string of traumas including a sexual assault and traumatic brain injury to bring up the ache she had been ignoring, but when she did, she found that God invited her towards something new— freedom. Even when her poor decisions heaped shame on top of all she was enduring, she was able to start to experience the depth of God's love in the middle of the mess of emotions she was enduring. Now, as a psychiatrist, trauma survivor and veteran, Dr. Stevens has taken what she has learned in her own journey to help veterans and first responders in theirs.

In this conversation, Davey talks with Dr. Stevens about how we often use achievement and performance to cope with our past, the power of God shown through our weakness, and how trauma can help us move from conditional to unconditional love.

If you find yourself trying to hide your past pain through achievement and performance and you are ready to experience the freedom God has for you, this episode will encourage you that God wants to release you from that which threatens to hold you back from

Many of us would love nothing more than to forget the worst things that have happened to us. We want to keep them secret, to pretend that if we don’t talk or even think about them then maybe they didn’t ever really happen. We try to replace redemption with forgetfulness, and end up carrying pain that goes unhealed for far too long as a result.

This was Kelly Olson’s story when she experienced a sexual assault as a freshman in college. Kelly kept her pain quiet for years, until one day she learned firsthand the power of a shared story.

Now Kelly makes it her mission to help others experience the same kind of healing that she did. Kelly sits down with Davey to share her story and what she’s learned about the true meaning of redemption along the journey.